If I’m in a coma, keep me on life support for one year. After that, turn it off, cause I’m probably not coming back.
If I’m brain dead, under no circumstances am I to be kept alive artificially.
My organs are to be donated where possible, but my body is not.
I do not want my dead body displayed in any way at a wake or funeral. My wife and immediate family can have a private viewing, if they want to say goodbye.
I am not to be buried. I am to be creamated. My wife may decide what to do with my ashes, I’ll update this if I come up with a specific thing I want done.
No organ music at my funeral. If it’s not in my CD collection, don’t play it. I would prefer a celebratory funeral.
Hopefully, I while people will be sad that I’m gone, they will be happy to have known me in their lives. Please, concentrate on the happy. And even if you hated me in life, you can be happy that I’m dead.
Also, please don’t spend a lot of money. Tell the funeral director to shove it. Have everyone bring their favorite food, and spend the time with friends and family, not looking at some bogus, expensive, lavish display that is so far removed from what is important in life. Seriously.
Okay, enough with the living will. Torts will do that to you.
Good god, man! Have you gone *insane*!? Publishing your last wishes online for all the world to see and for Google to archive and keep in perpetuity (as in, forever and ever, again, for all the world to see)?!
Really, it was a little odd reading this, but it’s brilliant! You may be starting a huge trend here because how can there ever be any confusion about what you want in these matters when everyone and anyone can just google it? But then, someone could always claim you wrote a document later and hid it somewhere, or that you weren’t serious about these being your last wishes since blog publishing is generally not taken seriously or used as method for such things. Still, though, it seems like kind of a good idea. Creepy a little, but good.
Whatever, I hope it’s a looong time before anyone needs to worry about your last wishes. (Or mine, for that matter.)
Hehehe. Okay, I’ll admit, it’s a tad morbid. But seriously, when you’re discussing negligence in torts and the class goes on and one debating cases where the spouse wants to terminate life support and the parents sue to prevent it, and, well, it makes the whole everything so unseemly. And it all could be avoided with a living will. So, I posted one.
At some point, I’m going to do a video, too, so there will be no doubt whatsoever about my intentions. But I’ll save that for another time… 🙂
To Whom It May Concern,
We here at Microsoft would respectfully ask that you remove the term “will” or any reference and/or connotation thereof to “will” from past, present, and future posts. Preferably, we would like you to show up to our German office in the “old sector” of Berlin to have the term permanently expunged from your neural net. (*1)
Microsoft has recognized that your posting is infringing on software – that we, of course, have had in the works for years and didn’t just think up when we read the comment saying it was a good idea – for posting last wishes online and must regretfully ask that you cease and desist from usage of this term immediately.
We firmly believe that we have the rights to this – or any other word of our choosing – and to govern usage accordingly. To reiterate, it is Microsoft’s position that “will” shall not be free.
Sincerely,
William (*2) Gates
(*1) Neural net is used in lieu of “brain” in this posting because Microsoft understands the brain goes hand-in-hand with common “cents”. At Microsoft, we are strictly concerned with the big-dollar picture and do not concern ourselves with pocket change. Therefore, “brain” use at Microsoft does not tie in to fiscal responsibility.
(*2) Usage note: This is the only free use of “will” that Microsoft recognizes.
I’m with ya, brother.